Why I Write (Erotica)

I think I’ve been writing sex scenes since I was twelve. Granted, they’ve gotten a bit better since then (I hope). I don’t admit to a lot of people that I write erotica. And when I do, it generally surprises them. As my boss’s son put it, “she’s too cute to write that stuff.” Instead, I say I write fiction or that I write about relationships, because it seems like a lot of people who don’t read erotica think it’s all about getting off.

Erotica is about sooooooooooo much more than that.

My son is nine months old as of this writing and my significant other and I talk a lot about how we want to deal with various issues as they arise, such as discipline, diet and exercise, etc. This includes sex. During one of these casual conversations, he mentioned that when our boy starts asking about sex that we should tell him that it’s about a very close connection to another human being and should be respected as such.

Revelation: me.

I’d never thought about it quite that way, but that’s why I love reading and writing erotica. It’s all about connection and feeling connected, or not. That’s what sex is. And that relationship, that connection, in all its forms, functions, reasons, motivations, manifestations, and feelings fascinates me.

Too bad it took me until my late twenties to realize that sex is about connection, but that’s a whole personal life issue. :)

I still probably won’t tell many people that I write erotica. But I will probably change that awkward “Oh, ummmmm I write… er, about relationships,” to “I write fiction about relationships and human connection. Usually with a cowboy hat and a saddle involved.” (Unfortunately, I’m so vanilla the saddle really is for the horse.)

So happy reading, happy writing, and remember, keep smiling—it makes people wonder what you've been up to. ~Author Unknown~

From: Dreamstime